Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Movie Montages


It's a prickly situation: you've brought your characters to a certain point, having effectively developed their hopes and dreams, but you aren't quite sure how to proceed in a time-efficient manner. Maybe you have to condense a year's worth of training into a three minute span. Perhaps you're looking to establish a motive for an otherwise inexplicably hardened criminal character. Or maybe, just maybe, a ragtag group of local kids just want to clean up the old rec center with a coat of fresh paint and a gloss of idealistic optimism. We can only hope.

Whatever the major plot hole, you can always enlist a dependable movie montage to plug these troublesome leaks. It's a sort of screenplay all-purpose grout to eliminate the cracks in between well-thought out plot points. We all know actual story development is tough--too tough, sometimes. Yes, we could probably have spent some time delving into the deeper issues and motivations at play, but montages do the trick in a pinch.

If you're looking to amp up your film's soundtrack, the montage is also a source of great musical inspiration. If you ever want anyone to listen to your movie's soundtrack while training for a marathon or somehow otherwise dreaming the impossible dream, it's imperative you back up your inspiring montage with an equally inspirational song. Imagine the Karate Kid montage without Joe Esposito's "You're the Best Around" blaring in the background. Nothing, right? Now add the song. Ahhh. Perfection.

Still lost on when to insert a montage into your roughly edited film project? Here are some handy hints from our friends from Team America: World Police:



If you're still looking for clarification on how to insert a cop-out montage to illustrate a major point in your film, try your best to adapt your montage vision to one of the following categories:

Training



This is the most common montage, and with good reason: how else are you supposed to illustrate the ups and downs of a trying training period in a short period of time? Real time training footage would be brutal--watching people lift weights is, honestly, incredibly boring. Plus, I can do it at the gym for free. Even then, I'd prefer to have a pump-it-up song playing on my iPod. It just works.

The training montage has many recognizable hallmarks, such as general physical exercise, excessive sweating, and repeated near-miss attempts to achieve some seemingly unattainable martial arts move/dance step/boxing feat. This last device is supposed to leave us in suspense about whether or not our hero will reach this particularly challenging goal, but its presence in the montage is a sure sign they absolutely will.

As Seen In: The Karate Kid, Dirty Dancing, Girls Just Want to Have Fun, and of course, all of the Rocky Movies--they practically invented the inspirational training montage


Falling in Love



In real life, meeting your mate is rarely a linear process. In movies, however, we've got to keep things moving for the sake of our viewers' sanity. Instead of experiencing a series of ups and downs over a long period of time, some films conveniently repackage the lengthy process into a mere two or three minutes. It may not be entirely accurate, but it's can be significantly more palatable than watching the full drawn-out process post meet-cute.

As Seen In: The Lion King. Can you feel the love tonight? They could. Montage style.


It's All Good



Everything going well, but you don't know how to convey it to the audience? Don't worry, there's a montage out there for you. The "It's All Good" model was designed specifically to portray a general Era of Good Feelings in your story. It's pretty boring to just watch a successful business run its day-to-day operations, so why not invest in some cheesy cut-together footage of the whole gang high fiving at their victories? It sure beats watching them change the office thermostat and answer the phone.

As Seen In: Ghostbusters, subverted and played for laughs in The Naked Gun


Let's Build Something Together



This is a pure 80s montage trope, exuding cheesiness from its every frame. According to the background music, all it takes is "One Foot in Front of the Other" to call to arms your mismatched group of social outcasts. Apparently with enough editing, even the nerdiest among us can look like construction experts and painting pros.

The Revenge of the Nerds scene was mocked mercilessly in an episode of Family Guy where the guys try to fix a dilapidated bar. To be fair, Family guy mocks everything mercilessly and this montage totally deserved it. You can't put out something this cheesy without an openness to endless parody.


As Seen In: Revenge of the Nerds



Overcoming Obstacles/Achieving Once-Impossible Goals

I know, I know, it sounds suspiciously similar to the training montage, but bear with me here for a few moments as I take you on a journey through the magical world of meeting our potential by being our honest selves. Sounds boring, right? It is. that's exactly why we need a montage--to move things along at a watchable speed.

In some cases (see: Back to School, Legally Blonde, other school-heavy movies) a montage is really your only out. Studying in itself is not a suspenseful or exciting activity, so if can show a clock spinning past the hours that would really help move things along. There's only so long the audience will tolerate watching a main character read quietly to himself. Don't push it.

Not all examples are quite so low-key. In Teen Wolf, Scott believes in himself--basketball montage style--just enough to resist "wolfing out" during the big game. What's that? That made no sense? Don't worry, it doesn't help if you've seen the movie. That actually might just make it more confusing. Either way, Scott defies the standard werewolf-to-human degeneration of basketball prowess and wins the big game. Hooray!

As Seen In: Legally Blonde, Teen Wolf, Back to School

Monday, May 24, 2010

School's Out for the Summer: Summertime Movies and Shows

Though most of us as adults don't get the luxury of the feverish excitement leading up to summer vacation, summertime still brings many of us a distinct sense of relaxation and fun. Even while we're cooped up working all day, it's a bit heartening to see the sunshine poking through the window of our cell--er, cubicle. It may not be a summer at the rec center pool or sleep-away camp, but we've got to take it where we can get it.

At the very least, the season gives us the chance to re-watch some of our old childhood summertime favorites. Or, failing that, you can at least read about it here while sneaking a break at work. It's minor consolation for those of us stuck pencil pushing, though hey, it's something. You won't get a savage tan or learn to swim a mean backstroke, but hopefully you'll crack a smile or two. At this point, that may be the best we can ask for as we count down to the glorious work-free Memorial Day weekend.

So kick back, relax, and take a journey into summertimes past. Well, don't kick back too much; I don't want to be blamed when your boss gets on your case about sipping frozen margaritas on the job. Use your discretion here.


Heavyweights



Here's a fun little-known 90s fact: did you know Heavyweights was produced by Judd Apatow? Oh, and that Ben Stiller plays a variation of that guy he played in Dodgeball and his father plays his father, just like in all those other movies? I admit this trivia is vague, but summertime research is for nerds. Anyway, who knew a movie about fat camp participants trying to take down a malicious fitness infomercial star could be so funny? The premise might not sound like much, but I promise, it's worth your while.


Salute Your Shorts



How many 90s kids out there hear the opening bars of reveille and immediately break into the Camp Anawanna song? It's almost a reflex. Now it's "I hope we never part" not "You make me wanna fart," so get it right or pay the price. Geez.


The Parent Trap



To this day, the main reason I want to learn how to play poker is with the secret hope that "Bad to the Bone" will spontaneously start blaring in the background. Well, secret's out. It's probably not worth it, anyway; I'm not so sure I'd have the guts to jump in the lake naked if I lost.


Now and Then



To girls growing up in the 90s, Now and Then is a legitimate classic. It's just the right blend of humor, coming-of-age drama, and just a dash of shmaltz thrown in for good measure. With its four distinct "types," we all had a character to whom to relate. Personally, I always fancied myself something of a Teeny.


The Sandlot



There's something about a good sports-themed coming of age film that has the power to take you back to a simpler time. To the kids of the Sandlot, the most important priorities for the summer are to play ball, kiss teenage lifeguards, and rescue their bat from the jaws of the dreaded Beast. Throw in some stomach-turning amusement park forays into chewing tobacco use and you've got yourself a hilarious--albeit nausea inducing--summertime adventure.


The Babysitter's Club




Oh, how my friends and I longed to boost an academically challenged peer's self confidence by staging an elaborate biology review complete with "The brain, the brain, the center of the chain" chant. Some abnormally responsible middle school girls have all the luck. I never even got to lie about my age to a 17-year old boy while simultaneously concealing the truth about my diabetes. Sigh.


Camp Nowhere



You have to love a movie built on the premise of a harebrained scheme dreamed up by a bunch of preteens. Even though our rational adult minds know nothing like this would ever unfold in real life, it's infinitely fun to imagine a world where a bunch of kids and Doc Brown could join forces to start a fake camp.


Saved by the Bell: Malibu Sands



Only Saved by the Bell has the power to condense a summer's worth of zany situation comedy and inevitable romantic drama into a neatly packaged six episodes. The show set the bar on introducing and subsequently disregarding all signs of existence of temporary characters, so it's no surprise Zack's romance with Stacey Carosi was short-lived. It was fun to see the whole gang living it up at the Malibu Sands club, but there's only so many beach storylines to go around. Once the girls battled it out in the Miss Liberty pageant, we knew it was time to go home.



Dirty Dancing



If you're interested in having the time of your life and feeling a way you've never felt before, I advise you pack up your things and head to a resort in the Catskills for summer break. There's a chance you might defy your affluent family by falling in love with a working-class guy from the wrong side of the country club kitchen, but that's a chance you've to be willing to take.


Dazed and Confused



Only a skillfully directed movie can stretch the meandering events of a single day into an interesting slice of everyday high school anthropology. Dazed and Confused takes us through the last day of school from the hazing to loitering to partying to eventually getting busted by the cops. It may sound as if I just gave away the whole movie in a short sentence, but don't worry. I didn't even get to the part where he listens to "Slow Ride" on his headphones. Oops. Sorry about that. Anyway, you should absolutely invest in this soundtrack; it's brilliant.

Runner Up: Wet Hot American Summer. Sure, it came out in 2001, but it's 80s themed and one of my favorite movies of all time. If you haven't seen it, it's imperative that you go out and rent it immediately. That's an order.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Winner of CSN Stores $60 Gift Card Giveaway!

Thanks to everyone for entering the Children of the 90s CSN Stores $60 Gift Card Giveaway! I had a lot of fun with it and I hope you all enjoyed your fleeting hope to win. The fun is in the possibility, after all. That's what we say to satiate sore losers, actually, but don't take it too personally. There's always next time.

That said, this will not be the last fun giveaway we do here at Children of the 90s. Remember to check back for exciting opportunities. And to read some high quality 90s nostalgia posts. That's always good, too.

Without further ado, I'm pleased to announce the winner of the CSN $60 Gift Card:


Nikki from Are You There Youth? It's Me, Nikki!

In case you've never had the honor of visiting Nikki's blog, I highly recommend you do so. She was one of the first nostalgia bloggers I connected with, and her posts are always thorough and hilarious. If you were a big reader growing up, you will absolutely love her young adult book reviews. That's my totally unsolicited plug for my randomly selected winner, so you know it must be true. Pure unpaid endorsement. Check her out. Congrats, Nikki! You deserve it. I will email you later today with the information for redeeming your gift certificate!

If anyone is interested in advertising or promotions with Children of the 90s, feel free to shoot me an email at childrenofthe90s@gmail.com. I implore you to please withhold judgment on my shameless plea for sponsorship, I'm not a sellout; I promise to keep bringing you high quality posts about your favorite 90s topics. A girl's got to eat, though, so, you know: sponsorships welcome. If you have any post topic suggestions or just want to say hi, that's totally cool, too. Let's chat.

Thank you all again for entering, following, facebooking, tweeting, and all of the other novelty internet verbage buzzwords applicable to your entries. You guys are the best. See you Monday for a return to your regularly scheduled 90s reminiscing. Until then, have a great weekend!

Digg This!